https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources daily 0.75 2024-03-27 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/taming-panic monthly 0.5 2021-07-06 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1625561610669-J5VOV6NRVGM9PVWE8LVY/photo-1620330400227-a051f6af31cb.jpeg Self-help Resources - Taming Panic - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/feeling-down-in-the-dumps-practise-some-positivity monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618230823837-YA1OPKYK6UJP1S6YM7YN/toshi-1299106-unsplash-764x1024.jpg Self-help Resources - Feeling down in the dumps/ practise some positivity https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618230774075-S5ZP6XGZP1W3BV7WMIES/josephine-amalie-paysen-302415-unsplash-1080x1620.jpg Self-help Resources - Feeling down in the dumps/ practise some positivity https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618230842604-37Z4SILMEEFEOWYR0G67/joshua-clay-27368-unsplash-1080x720.jpg Self-help Resources - Feeling down in the dumps/ practise some positivity https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618230757806-IANJAWKUNIKRML7AR3IZ/diana-parkhouse-1166627-unsplash-1080x720.jpg Self-help Resources - Feeling down in the dumps/ practise some positivity https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/feeling-bogus-perhaps-its-imposter-syndrome monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/a-short-blog-on-optimism monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219389866-L08MJXG2Z3I6SWVTFPA0/photo-1518946222227-364f22132616-768x576.jpeg Self-help Resources - A Short Blog on Optimism https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219490464-UZGSS07O2C0QJEX4HTLE/photo-1563443803769-a5c44bd91e39-683x1024.jpg Self-help Resources - A Short Blog on Optimism https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219295579-UUTT00R4UPZ7TKKGJJWG/photo-1472162072942-cd5147eb3902.jpeg Self-help Resources - A Short Blog on Optimism - Spend half an hour with an optimist or a positive person and you’re probably more likely to feel upbeat or more positive yourself. Optimists don’t have easier lives necessarily, but they choose to view things with a more hopeful attitude. Perhaps they find it easier to move on from past difficulties and understand that the future may well be different? Having a rubbish week at work won’t have to define the following week or having an argument with someone doesn’t mean that you are an unlovable or an unpleasant person. Optimists find it easier to make the most of a situation…and then move on, but this doesn’t mean they don’t feel anger, frustration and sadness too. https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/still-overthinking monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618230218252-TEWLVJXP579TTBKQUAH2/jakob-owens-1453783-unsplash-1024x683.jpg Self-help Resources - Still Overthinking? https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/yoga-for-your-mind-and-your-body monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220238950-J44KFW558N1IX5ZXLUFL/photo-1484452330304-377cdeb05340.jpeg Self-help Resources - Yoga ~ For your mind and your body https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220271670-UKF7TF23VMWK94WE0COY/photo-1554245064-3ab88761ac5d.jpeg Self-help Resources - Yoga ~ For your mind and your body https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220181916-IG408G828DBQJTKLL9EK/photo-1524159731840-3490a27baedd.jpeg Self-help Resources - Yoga ~ For your mind and your body I got so tired about a month ago that I decided to look at things from the other way round… https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/world-friendship-day monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220470711-XTRUTLWRGOSY7VVWXGQ2/photo-1533299150403-a196e9ae00ea.jpeg Self-help Resources - World Friendship Day https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220498716-7UDQCS2AKGCS9W1EJLO7/photo-1516726283839-a493d9f167aa.jpeg Self-help Resources - World Friendship Day https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/anger-doormats-bulldozers-and-things-in-between monthly 0.5 2024-03-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219825041-9PMAVMCG3QV9JL238SOB/photo-1517242027094-631f8c218a0f.jpeg Self-help Resources - Anger: Doormats, Bulldozers and things in between! - Too scared to face up to Darth Vader, walking off in a huff seemed the only option! https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219757796-IVXXFW7TR4IO311IYBOL/photo-1563371351-b46ba4a9ab67-768x1024.jpeg Self-help Resources - Anger: Doormats, Bulldozers and things in between! https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219938220-V87K628WJJLS37XL7DIV/photo-1527631120902-378417754324.jpeg Self-help Resources - Anger: Doormats, Bulldozers and things in between! https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219969581-OUL0LWJIW8205JOZ2T8H/photo-1532533468038-e1e3b72caf5a.jpeg Self-help Resources - Anger: Doormats, Bulldozers and things in between! - How to deal with a situation that makes you feel angry?According to Darmour, choose the ‘pillar’ response. Assertively explaining how you feel, without having to raise your voice or stamp your feet. Letting someone know how their behaviour makes you feel. Maybe that person had not realised? Either way, you are giving both sides the opportunity for a bit of reflection. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618219640921-FQNUXT4CZMK2ZXKCSMAD/photo-1529570058547-733204bf87e5-768x419.jpeg Self-help Resources - Anger: Doormats, Bulldozers and things in between! https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/coronavirus-managing-your-health-anxiety monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/seasonal-affective-disorder-sad monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1621160558759-M2J5LUF4LQFQD6ZLI23T/anh-nguyen-515149-unsplash-755x1024.jpg Self-help Resources - Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-the-aftermath-of-severe-emotional-shock monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1621161239146-Q32YDN7D348DANL588J6/milos-tonchevski-304529-unsplash-768x960.jpg Self-help Resources - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder… the aftermath of severe emotional shock. - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/ticked-off-time-for-some-tips-on-anger monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618230055702-91FLCFEYSXV4QXL244PO/jean-wimmerlin-535180-unsplash-1080x720.jpg Self-help Resources - Ticked off? Time for some tips on anger https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/relaxation-techniques monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220821669-MFT4IBMV0XQ4A1RQWVMI/YEc7WB6ASDydBTw6GDlF_antalya-beach-lulu.jpg Self-help Resources - Relaxation techniques https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220794906-CYYMOZVUZYWDTITFGSWY/photo-1544133782-b62779394064.jpg Self-help Resources - Relaxation techniques https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220892964-1X60I1V902B4XP4PQVMI/photo-1541944743827-e04aa6427c33-1-768x614.jpeg Self-help Resources - Relaxation techniques https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220770331-6OWGTGRCTQQ5E7Y64ECC/photo-1562885683-1fbb1f61096f.jpg Self-help Resources - Relaxation techniques https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220858519-8JX5P8F8SMSWKL4JQC1C/photo-1471286174890-9c112ffca5b4.jpeg Self-help Resources - Relaxation techniques https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1618220841848-0KKJILH8MJJNLD1TIN5B/photo-1508050249562-b28a87434496.jpeg Self-help Resources - Relaxation techniques https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/simple-pleasures-boost-your-mood monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/blog-post-title-one-s3xgp monthly 0.5 2021-04-12 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/blog-post-title-two-jw5ba monthly 0.5 2021-04-12 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/blog-post-title-three-5bl69 monthly 0.5 2021-04-12 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/blog-post-title-four-8c9yd monthly 0.5 2021-04-12 https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/procrastination-the-thief-of-time monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1621161424591-YXXEC9OPGV95WK9GKW6T/neonbrand-304490-unsplash-768x505.jpg Self-help Resources - Procrastination. The Thief of Time. - Make it stand out Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference. https://www.anxietytame.com/self-help-resources/christmas-stress-maybe-lower-your-expectations monthly 0.5 2021-05-16 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1621160698640-FKM2L2ZRJFAIMIG6W7SL/roberto-nickson-g-715417-unsplash-683x1024.jpg Self-help Resources - Christmas Stress? Maybe lower your expectations! “Expectation is the mother of all frustration” -Antonio Banderas Santa’s Story * The Build Up Santa was stressed. He’d had a really busy year with the demands of work, constant emails from clients, an unruly workforce to manage and then the travel! (Twenty-four hours worth of deliveries, without a break, he wasn’t sure that was legal!) He was frustrated that his employees couldn’t keep up with their work and that his wife and kids didn’t seem as keen as him to get the house ready for the 25th. The Panic Sitting down to his Christmas dinner he suddenly felt the strangest sensations: palpitations, dizziness, difficulty focussing and shortness of breath. Santa felt like he was having an out-of-body experience. “I’m going to faint!” he thought to himself, “and then what will everyone think of me?” This thought made Santa’s breathing increase further and rather than try to sit out the panic attack he ran upstairs and hid under his duvet. Santa felt anxious and low and hiding from the family seemed like his only option. Seeking Support At his wits’ end, Santa visited a psychotherapist and together they explored the things that might have triggered his panic attack. There was a sense of relief at being able to speak about work demands and the constant pressure to perform, “I am responsible for everyone’s happiness!” he cried. For weeks he hadn’t been able to go on his daily walks and the lack of sunshine where he lived seemed to be adding to Santa’s low mood. What’s more he was comfort eating and starting on the sherry a little earlier every evening. Together with the therapist, he concluded that he was giving everything to everyone else, had nothing left for himself and his anxiety ‘bucket’ had overflowed causing a really nasty panic attack. Those high expectations of himself, his workers and his family were maintaining his anxiety and he really wasn’t looking after himself. Reluctantly he agreed to experiment with a bit of behavioural change to see if this would help. Small Changes Santa couldn’t possibly be expected to be on call 24/7, so he decided there would be no answering emails after 5:30pm and he wouldn’t be taking his phone with him on walks. Similarly, he would have to stop expecting everyone around him to be perfect and he found that once he stopped expecting things from other people, he stopped feeling disappointed with them. The more Santa practised these new behaviours, the easier he found it and gradually his anxiety level dropped. Next session, he drew a responsibility chart (more on this in the next blog) and concluded that he couldn’t POSSIBLY be responsible for everyone else’s happiness and this was a weight lifted (a cognitive shift apparently!) Reduced Expectations = Reduced Anxiety? Christmas time is supposed to be a time of happiness (yet another expectation) but many people experience stress and anxiety. Could reducing our expectations of ourselves and others help? Don’t expect yourself to get everything ready in time for the big day. Don’t expect tired and exited kids to ‘behave’. Do take some time for yourself to relax or exercise. Do get everyone to muck in on Christmas day (that’s what little helpers are for!) Don’t expect an ‘Insta-perfect’ Christmas because it doesn’t exist! Don’t put pressure on yourself to buy too many gifts…it’s expensive. Don’t put pressure on yourself to be a social butterfly if this leaves you exhausted. Do get some sleep instead. Do like Santa and think about how to reduce your anxiety bucket. *name changed for confidentiality! https://www.anxietytame.com/about daily 0.75 2024-03-27 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1619355195439-N4I4HYNFCDD0W39X6MQI/Beck+laptop+%281%29.jpg About https://www.anxietytame.com/home daily 1.0 2025-05-30 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1622190865348-S2B49FRZKYO1YAHSIZGH/Beck+laptop.jpg Home Rebecca is an accredited Cognitive Behavioural Therapist OCD, panic disorder, phobia, trauma, social anxiety, sleep problems, hair pulling, anxiety. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/606c41afdab8ab30cd8ba8e1/1619354870195-NLNPQQ7FFVGAEGDT4HXH/Beck+laptop+%281%29+2.jpg Home - Does CBT work? Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is an effective treatment for anxiety and depression, which is why it’s widely used in the NHS. There’s plenty of research evidence to support this. When people ask me if it works, I explain that it is like anything in life; the more you practise, the more you will gain. Engaging with Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can help you find new ways to behave and challenge unhelpful ways of thinking. 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