"There's no problem so awful, that you can't add some guilt to it and make it even worse"Calvin: The Complete Calvin and Hobbes, Bill Watterson Over the years, the theme of guilt has come up in therapy sessions with such frequency, that you'd hope I'd be an expert on...
Photo: Hugo Jehanne @ Unsplash A state of high alert and chronic reassurance seeking are a couple of the symptoms of health anxiety and also of a realm of other mental health issues. Although asking a physician or friend if there is anything physically wrong with you...
Photo: Artur Tumasjan for Unsplash How are you finding Lockdown? It’s been over 12 weeks now. Maybe things haven’t changed that much and you haven’t stopped working? It’s estimated that around 8.9 million of the UK’s workforce has been furloughed since March,...
Photo credit: Daniel Cheung (Unsplash) "Don't get too deep, it leads to overthinking, and overthinking leads to problems that don't even exist in the first place" Jayson Engay, poet. I know I’ve written about it before, but I seem to be hearing about overthinking more...
"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint" Mark Twain Who could have predicted the events of February and March, 2020? An atmosphere of disbelief and worry seems to have drifted over us and stopped us in our tracks. Uncertainty about what might...
“There is a sunrise and a sunset every single day, and they are absolutely free” Jo Walton (Science Fiction and fantasy author) I was fortunate enough to get to my 30s before Facebook and Instagram became a big thing. I grew up without other people having so much...
Let's face it, anger is a common emotion. Think of the last time you felt angry - in a car, after someone made a snippy comment, watching the news? Plenty of things can provoke that feeling. The rub is we're not really encouraged to express it. Growing up, we may have...
Enter if you choose. It's been a little while since I have written a blog, I’ve got a whole heap of excuses why but basically it comes down to procrastination! I was listening to Billy Connolly speaking on Nihal’s Radio 5 show the other day and felt this was the boot...
I have been a fan of yoga and mindfulness meditation for a while. I find a daily mindful meditation easy enough to incorporate into my day but the yoga practice had been neglected. I am an expert at having something more pressing to do/ being too tired after work/or...
"Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down". Oprah Winfrey Wise words and one person’s take on real friendship. But if you asked ten people what makes a true friend, I...
(to encourage calm) If you are struggling with anxiety, try not to feel helpless, there are plenty of things you can do to help yourself. Anxiety might be uncomfortable and upsetting but it isn't dangerous. You'd think that breathing is one of the most natural...
‘When I won the Oscar, I thought it was a fluke. I thought everybody would find out, and they’d take it back. They’d come to my house, knocking on the door, “Excuse me, we meant to give that to someone else. That was going to Meryl Streep.” Jodie Foster I am fortunate...
On the eve of National Sewing Machine Day (brilliant!) and National Weed Your Garden Day (only for the hardcore gardener in this weather). I thought it was pertinent to remind myself and anyone else who cares to read this, about the importance of embracing your inner...
*So short, even my kids might read it! When I see anxious clients, I try to introduce them to Mindfulness if I think it might help. People with chronic worry and a stream of "What if?" questions are better off not trying to chase the worries. However, when the worry...
Anger. Frustration. Irritation. Annoyance. These are all very human emotions. We could all write our lists of what pushes our buttons and I guess we have all had to bite our tongue at times (or not!) But as Jack Nicholson’s character in the film, Anger Management, put...
Overthinking is common, but too much of it can be problematic. It’s a distraction from actually being in the here and now and getting on with life. Some people believe that when they are thinking about a problem they are actually problem-solving and I don’t doubt this...
When I started writing this blog, I looked through some ‘famous quotes’ about being perfect. The more I read, the more it seemed that the take-home messages from people like Natalie Dormer and John Legend were: a. none of us are perfect, and b. we need to accept our...
Long face? If you’re mood is low and you don’t seem to be able to snap out of it, well that can be really frustrating. Feeling flat can affect not only ourselves but the people around us…let’s face it, it’s hard work being with a mood-hoover! The bad news (literally)...
During the ‘warm down’ after a recent gym class, the instructor played Baz Luhrmann’s Everybody’s Free (To WearSunscreen)*. After forty minutes in the company of Boot-Camp Barbara (she had clearly trained with Special Forces) and her high...
Part of the human experience involves feeling guilty from time to time. We may feel guilty when we have behaved badly, made a mistake or upset someone else. We might have overstepped the line with a friend and said something unkind or forgotten to send a...
Let’s imagine ourselves as an iceberg… The parts we show, our automatic thinking, how we respond to what’s going on around us – this is easily accessible – maybe think of this as the tip of the iceberg on top of the water. This smaller, superficial part is...
Let’s be clear. I am no neuroscientist, but this is how I would explain an extreme physical response to a threat: There is a very small, almond shaped part of our brains called the Amygdala.The Amygdala would appear to be the brain’s ‘Early Warning System’ and sets...
I don’t now about you, but whenever I read one of those cringe-worthy ‘motivational quotes’ imploring me to invest in myself today in order to reap some bountiful harvest tomorrow, I fester a little inside. Yep, if I plant that seed today, I might well gather...
checking (n) the process of making sure that something is correct or satisfactory When stress builds up in our lives we are prone to low mood and anxiety. We might be dealing with daily pressures and then something else will happen, like a birth, a...
Today I’m struggling with procrastination. Apparently I’m not on my own with this. I have spoken to friends and family who seem to be feeling a little bit ‘challenged’ at getting back into work, studies or writing this January. The irony is that in the US, it is...
Hi and a very belated New Year to you! I have had a month or so of just hanging out with my family and friends and have neglected the blog somewhat…but I’m back on it now. In my last post I mentioned how anxiety could be maintained when we take on too much unnecessary...
"Expectation is the mother of all frustration" -Antonio Banderas Santa's Story * The Build Up Santa was stressed. He’d had a really busy year with the demands of work, constant emails from clients, an unruly workforce to manage and then the travel! (Twenty-four...
This year's International Stress Management Association theme, 'Does Hi-tech cause Hi-Stress?', prompted me to think about my use of technology and one device in particular. When did I start taking my iPhone to the bathroom with me and responding Pavlov-style to every...
Last winter was perhaps one of the longest I can remember in a long time. It felt as if it started at the end of October and persisted on into March this year. Many of my clients spoke about feeling down throughout the winter months and being fed up with the darkness...
Millions of us fell silent today to mark the centenary of Armistice Day. Watching both my local memorial service and the BBC footage from the London cenotaph was a moving experience. It's hard to imagine how it must have been for service people coming back from the...
Perhaps International Stress Awareness Day is an auspicious day to start writing a blog? Each year, the first Wednesday in November has been chosen as National Stress Awareness Day UK and the mental health charity Mind have ideas and tips on their website to help...